Body Image, Teens and the Internet #wellnesswednesday

Screen Shot 2017-03-13 at 18.44.01I took the Trusted Clothes quiz on body image concerning young girls and I couldn’t believe how much I didn’t know. Girls are more concerned about being called ‘fat’ than losing their parents, nuclear war or failing at school. How!? What??! There is also an increasing rate of boys with self esteem issues with the rise of social media. Every time I clicked on an answer, I couldn’t stop shaking my head. I can’t believe this is the world we live in. Then it got me thinking…and researching.

I wrote a very similar post before about Body Image. How the internet is a pivotal connection for those who are in need of guidance, but can be a place detrimental to a young person’s health. We as adults use the internet a little more wisely (or can be argued not as much!), however- for young people this isn’t necessarily a tool of communication. It’s comparison at the touch of a button or scroll.

Only 5% of women naturally possess the body type often portrayed by Americans in the media.

In researching, I started off by simply googling the term ‘body image’. There are plenty of useful websites out there, first with Planned Parenthood. The only downfall of these vital searches, the layout and content of these sites are, in all honesty, not user friendly. It’s extremely clinical, and not active for young people. The content is so sooooo useful, but the website’s appearance lets it down. We need to see an improvement of web content for young people in order for them to feel like they have access to the information they need.

According to do something.org, 95% of people with eating disorders are between the ages of 12 and 25. Then why, as social media usage has risen, are we not creating supportive and informative content that is marketed towards that age group? Pew Research Centre said a staggering 71% of teens use more than one social network site, with teenage girls using social media sites — particularly visually-oriented ones — for sharing more than their male counterparts do. Why are we not looking at the research and creating accessible and visually appealing content for young people regarding mental health issues and body image? The top websites in the search bar I have been on in relation to body image and self esteem feels clinical, awkward to use and without a connection to the audience.

The research is super mind blowing regarding adults too, the British Social Attitudes conducted a survey in 2014, three-quarters (77%) of adults think that society puts too much pressure on females to have a sexualised appearance, half of all adults (47%) think that ‘how you look affects what you can achieve in life’, and one-third (32%) agree with the statement ‘your value as a person depends on how you look’.

But things are looking up. 
There are such INCREDIBLE organisations out there doing amazing things for young people. We need to address these existing issues, and with wonderful non-profit organisations (some I’ve had the super sweet pleasure of working with) like Heads Together, Welsh based Heads Above The Waves, The Golddigger Trust from Sheffield and the almighty Young Minds rallying for change- we can see these figures drop significantly. Support the non-profits that are in your local area. Mental health awareness is on the rise, and we need to stand together. Let’s make social media an accessible place for young people to help them grow positively.

The best way out is always through – Robert Frost

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Oh Hey, It’s Been A While!

Wow. It’s been a while folks.

Seeing as it’s been 5ever (yeah…longer than 4eva ya get me) since my last post, I think I’ll utilise the time spent away from written posts, to do a little bit of a reflection.

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There’s nothing better than a bit of a self development, reflection and an abundance of love, right?

So, what’s been going down?

  • My business/brand Keep Real has since been registered as a UK Trademark. Heck yeah!!! So flippin chuffed, and to have come that far since I first had the idea- is a wonderful testament to some hard work, tears and maybe a lil’ bit of sweat and blood thrown in there for good measure.
  • I’ve been working full time in Leeds, and loving all my gals who work with me. There’s some major love right there. Honestly, it’s so empowering and sweet to work with the women I do! ❤ (shoutout to Briggate wassupp!)
  • Keep Real saw it’s first photoshoot completed at the end of January this year with my
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    Sneaky peek!!

    talented close friend Alex Ivory in Leeds City Centre. We had some wonderful passionate people join the team- I think there was around 12 of us! To have so many people working with you, and seeing your idea materialise, there really isn’t any other feeling like it. Humbled, loved, a smushball of kind hearts all in that studio. To everyone who worked with me, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, truly a huge thank you.

  • YouTube was a thing, and still is a thing for me. I always try and find some time to do visual content regarding mental health; however my days are fairly long! I wish I could find the time to do them more- as there was a lot of positive feedback. Maybe 2017 will see me do some more, who knows!

“To have so many people working with you, and seeing your idea materialise, there really isn’t any other feeling like it.”

Ultimate reflection: This year has been wonderful so far, and I think to reflect- I need to take a step back sometimes and not be so hard on myself. Every time I have a bad day, I tend to beat myself up about it. It’s something I’m constantly learning from, but I’m so thankful to notice my weaknesses. That can only be a strength, right?

So what have you guys been up to? Hope you are all well!

Kimberley xxxx

Slow Down, Let Go.

Slow down, let go. 

But how?

We’re living in a fast paced, technologically advanced, weirdly driven world that has pretty much pushed us so much; that in all honesty, has failed to be good to our very souls. It’s advancing more than we can deal with, our human minds being pushed to limits we’re not so sure we can handle. I haven’t messaged them back, I’m such a terrible friend. What will they think of me? I need to post an update! Do I need this app to improve my life? Will this game bring me joy, or will it distract me? I need to check my profiles. How many followers do I have? What are my friends up to?

Does this sound familiar maybe? It’s probably crossed your mind.

We sometimes feel glued to our screens, unable to respond quickly enough to the present- while we’re all worrying about our online worlds. What we appear to be, seems very much a focus, not what we truly are. It’s tough to see kids not playing in the streets as much, and the heavy burdens they bare to online bullying, how many likes they’ve received and how hard it is to fit in. It was hard before, and it’s even harder now.

I know I’ve felt the pang of guilt for not replying, or responding as quickly as I’d like. I work hard and the pressures of ‘keeping up appearances’ doesn’t get me down that much. We don’t always have to respond quickly or post things all the time. Of course I’d like to be doing exciting things every day, going exploring and taking time off- but it isn’t necessarily online.

Remember: You are enjoying things for younot for your following or the folk you talk to online. Hold your friendships dear, but enjoy the present while you’re in it. Slow down, let go

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10 Ways Back To The Light

Hey folks, I wanted to share with you an article I found on Psychologies by Jamie Rhodes author of ‘Instrumental: A Memoir of Madness, Medication and Music’ (purchase here)4e39e58e38bdf17dbffc00a175afaa34, and Matt Haig, author of ‘Reasons to Stay Alive’ (purchase here) about the top ten strategies that helped them through the more difficult times. These are wonderful, and I hope they help you too! (read it down below, or in the original article here) ❤

10 Ways Back To The Light

James Rhodes says:

Breathe – 10 minutes of meditation a day works wonderrs.

Make a cuppa “I’d somehow got enough clarity and self-awareness to know that I was able now to do all I could to get well… It was terrifying and exciting all at once. Time maybe to have a cup of tea and listen to Chopin’s greatest nocturne – the one in C minor Op. 48/1.

Talk to anyone friendly. “I like talking to strangers. I read a book about depression once where the protagonist was so lonely she used to join queues simply for the human interaction. And while things weren’t quite that bad yet, I did at times strike up conversations with people.

Do something creative (piano/writing for me, but there is an almost infinite choice for everyone) “Forgiveness and meditation, reading and writing, talking and sharing all help, creativity is, for me, one of the most profound ways through trauma.”

Find some perspective. Remember you’re a microscopic dot hurtling around the universe on a tiny planet in the middle of an unfathomable amount of space.

Matt Haig says:

Slow down. “Anxiety runs your mind at fastforward rather than normal ‘play’ speed, so addressing that issue of mental ‘pace’ might not be easy. But it works.”

Go for a run and then do yoga (the golden bullet for my anxiety) “I was a yogaphobe, but am now a convert. It’s great, because unlike other therapies, it treats the mind and the body as part of the same whole.”

Get off the internet. “I might – if I am going through a neurotic patch – do a quick ego search, or check out any new Goodreads or Amazon reviews of my books or go on Google and type in a list of real or imaginary ailments to see which terminal disease I am currently suffering from.

Talk to people you love. “Words. Comfort. Support. It took me more than a decade to be able to talk openly, properly, to everyone, about my experience. I soon discovered the act of talking is in itself a therapy. Where talk exists, so does hope.

Stare at the sky. “Look at the sky. Remind yourself of the cosmos. Seek vastness at every opportunity, in order to see the smallness of yourself.”

3 Simple Steps to Improved Mental Health

Sometimes we overlook the small things that can make a difference to our wellbeing. We try radical ways to see if something big can change the course of our thoughts and c27b72ab524503258c478790d691b27bfeelings. However,  sometimes all we need to do is try take a step back, and see what tiny things we can do to feel a little better. Here’s my Top 3 things to consider and perhaps note down. As always, be gentle with yourself!

You can also check out my previous post on 5 Ways of Coping with the bad days too.

 

So.. here’s my 3 Simples Steps!

  1. Write it down– I chose this as the top simple step. I know folk love their phones and reminders on their laptops, but we forget that writing is very cathartic. Pickthebrain.com stated that ‘When you can place your emotional difficulties into a piece of writing, there is a great sense of “letting go” that can help you “right” yourself in your world again’. You don’t have to write a massive paragraph and it doesn’t even have to make sense, even if its just a few words that sum up your day. Remember, it’s your notebook/diary/journal. You can write whatever you wish in it. For me personally, it really helps me break down how I feel and keep a track of 99e5363a41321d08650266084d34aa65
    what’s been going on.
  2. Drink Water – Silly right? But yes, this is the simplest step. Our bodies are made up of up to 60% water. It’s a vital nutrient for our wellbeing and we tend to not drink that much H20. It regulates our body temperature, helps to keep skin healthy and does all sorts of cool things for us. We can get a certain amount of water from what we eat, but keeping hydrated is key to wellbeing. Try not to
    consume too much caffeinated drinks, as these can increase heart rate and can make you feel restless/jittery. And we don’t want that do we! Try green tea with lemon, or just soft drinks without all that sugary/sweetener in. Put some fresh fruit in your water for flavour, like lemon, strawberries, blueberries…anything! Mix it up! Here is Shapes’ tips for making water taste less boring. ❤
  3. Breathe – We all find it hard to just take a step back from our day. We’ve got deadlines, we’ve got work, we just haven’t got time to sit and be one with ourselves. But trust me, you do have time. You should always have time for you- even if you only allow yourself 5-10 minutes. Here’s my favourite Mindful techniques to Reduce Stress. Just noticing what you are doing, even when you’re eating or having a break. Enjoy it! Breaaatthhheee. The 3 steps to mindful breathing are >  Choose a “down” time: on the train in the shower, making breakfast. Shift your focus to your breathing and pick a single aspect to focus on: the rising and falling of your chest or the sensation in your nose. Spend at least five minutes in this state of awareness; when your mind wanders, gently direct it back to your breath.

We forget to breathe, drink and do a bit of writing to process our thoughts. These little things can make us feel just that little bit better in ourselves. ❤ take care of yourself, and if you have any questions please feel free to email me kimmykeepreal@gmail.com

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

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Our Wellbeing & Our Product Choices

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Hey folks, hope you are all doing well! andddd I’ve just seen that I now have over 7k views on the blog so far since last year! Thank you ever so much, I am so so humbled!! I wanna discuss wellbeing and how it affects us through the products or clothes we buy. Being mindful of our choices as people can truly help us feel that little bit better in ourselves ❤

So for starters…

Wellbeing is, as a definition:

The state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy.

There’s a lot that wellbeing is influenced by. From our mental health, what we eat, who we surround ourselves with, to what we purchase throughout our lives. Wellbeing is something we try to cultivate and maintain.

We all know that our clothes and things we buy reflect our personalities, and the essence of who we are as people. Why are we drawn to certain things? Some would say that we are attracted to specific clothes, products and objects based on our needs. Christian Jarrett from The Psychologist stated that ‘How much we see our things as an extension of ourselves, may depend in part in how confident we feel about who we are.’

So, what we’re truly saying is that it all comes from within, right? To truly see our clothes, objects, products as an extension of our inner souls, all depends on how we feel about our complete selves in the first place. We need to take a step back and reflect on our values too. Are you drawn to certain brands that reflect your personality? Or is it because it’s quick and easy to buy?

For me, I like to use products that reflect my passion for sustainability, and giving back to the Earth. Personally, I’m extremely passionate about wellbeing and taking care of our bodies. This goes from my brand choice for skincare (The Bodyshop, 100% Vegetarian, All natural ingredients, Cruelty Free, commitment of ‘Enrich Not Exploit’), to cruelty free make-up (Barry M Cosmetics and Sleek here in the UK) and my clothing choices too. I believe that when I purchase something, it makes me more confident in myself by making mindful choices. My clothes are lasting longer, the personal care products I use make me feel amazing knowing they’re giving back, and I know my clothes are made from people with fairer wages, who aren’t exploited in the hard work they do.

When buying products, clothes or anything just be that little bit more mindful. If brands are doing wonderful things for others and the planet- then contributing to that can make us feel super lovely ❤ Just by doing this, you’re making a difference.

Isn’t that a wonderful thought?!

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My Top 5: Ways of Coping with the Bad Days

Now, a lot of people have a wonderful variety of coping strategies with the days that are just that little bit harder to get through. When I did some research for my degree- there’s a lot of different healthy ways we find that suits us due to our personality traits and personal preferences. For example, folk who are naturally creative love to use art in different mediums to feel better and in others they use music, physical exercise or experiencing the outdoors. Screen Shot 2016-05-17 at 14.31.50

As long as your coping strategy is not harmful to you or others, and you can feel better by exploring your coping strategies in a safe and healthy way- then there is no wrong way of doing it. You’re doing what is best for you my lovely!  Mind have a wonderful section on their site about self-care which I extremely recommend on checking out.

Here are my personal Top 5 that I feel help me the most, and perhaps they can help you too! Be gentle with yourself ❤

  1. Ecotherapy – otherwise known as the great green outdoors. Spending time away from distractions, the city life or just by getting out of the house into a natural environment can be so helpful. It is quite a mindful experience, and for me it clears my head. I’m very thankful to live in Yorkshire, and living right next to the woods. Find your place and go there as often as you can. Be one with nature and enjoy it.
  2. Reading – now this doesn’t have to be books on self-help or mindfulness, but a genre or type of book you really enjoy. Love a bit of adventure? Get your Tolkien game on! Like a bit of a classic? Flick through a good Jane Austen! Whatever floats your boat, give it a read. But I will say, be gentle with yourself. You’re doing this for you, remember! Some books with graphic content may be triggering to your wellbeing. My favourite book for the past year has been ‘Just Kids’ by Patti Smith. As a naturally creative person, and I feel I’m having a block/ bad day- I read her book and her prose.
  3. Playing an instrument – I know some folk don’t have musical instruments, but this is one of my personal favourites. I was fortunate enough to be given a classical guitar by my Mum’s friends years and yeaaarrss ago that I still have. You somehow get lost in it, and its just the combination of making sound and feeling the movements. If you don’t have access to anything like that, my next coping strategy is…
  4. Listening to music – Boy can music change your soul. Whatever clicks with you and makes you feel good give it a listen. Pop your headphones on, lay back and shut off the world. You can listen to your favourites/most played or go for super funny songs like ‘I’ve Got A Pocket Full of Sunshine’ by Natasha Bedingfield or the Flashdance Soundtrack (soooooo groovy)
  5. Art- This encompasses everything to scribbles, writing, doodles and full blown commissions for me. It gets me in a nice groove that I can focus on. Controlling the way the pencil moves, or shading in something can be a very mindful experience. Allowing yourself to get lost in it, and only think of what you are creating really helps me get in a good headspace. Also, I write a hell of a lot  when I feel down. I’ve kept a diary for years that I always tend to look back on. Sometimes I don’t know how I feel, so I write whatever is going on in my lil brain down. It’s very cathartic, even if its just in bullet points of things that are bothering me. It also allows me to check in with myself and see what’s affecting me, or what I could highlight as something that needs to change.

 

I hope my Top 5 may help, or perhaps gently give you the smallest ideas of ways to cope. From knitting to running or reading and playing monopoly, there’s so many healthy ways of coping with the bad days.

You are not alone. You are here, and you are enough.